Pregnant Woman’s World Shattered Days Before Birth After Boyfriend Reveals He’s Already Got a Family

At age 23, and just days away from becoming a mother, a woman was shocked by a terrible lie: the man she had been seeing for two years—the one who had promised to move in with her and raise their child together—was not only not divorced, but he was also not even split. She thought she was building a future for two years. Instead, she is now becoming a mother by herself.

A shocking discovery at the last minute can have huge effects on both emotions and plans. The idea of a relationship is no longer there. There is no longer any trust. Also, it happened at the worst possible time for women: when they were giving birth. Now, instead of having a support system to help her get ready for labour, she has to change her whole plans without much notice.

Having a child with the person you love should be a happy moment. Infidelity can wreck this beautiful time

Pregnant woman and boyfriend embracing tenderly, capturing a moment before revealing secret wife and impending childbirth. — Image credits: Amina Filkins / Pexels (not the actual photo)

An anonymous pregnant woman begged the internet for help after discovering that her boyfriend had a secret wife

1. Let Yourself Feel Everything

It wasn’t “just a breakup.” A whole life plan fell apart at this point. Betrayal trauma, especially when it happens around important life events like giving birth, can cause strong emotional reactions like shock, disassociation, and grief. Verywell Mind says that betrayal can make some people show signs of PTSD, especially if trust has been used as a tool for a long time (verywellmind.com).

Woman looking distressed and worried, holding her head and neck, reflecting on boyfriend’s secret wife before childbirth. — Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels (not the actual photo)

You can feel angry, scared, numb, or confused at any time. Not only are your feelings okay, people expect them. Write in a journal, cry, or rant in secret, or talk to a friend you trust or, if you can, a therapist. Now is not the time to hide your pain. You need space to think about it.

2. Focus on the Birth, Not the Breakdown

Because of his deception, you and your baby’s health are more important right now. You’ll soon be going into labour, which is a huge physical and mental task. Get someone to help you during labour if you can. This could be a trusted friend, your mother, a doula, or even a nurse advocate. Having someone in the room who truly cares about you can make a huge difference in lowering stress at work and getting better results (marchofdimes.org).

Tell the hospital workers that he is not your support person. Make it clear that you don’t want him there. You deserve a birth that is calm, safe, and helped.

3. Establish Boundaries Immediately

He told you lies. Several times. He broke your trust, wasted your time, and put your mental safety at risk right before you gave birth. From now on, if he wants to talk to you or the baby, it has to be on your terms only. Those things are:

Not being present at the hospital
No unsupervised contact with the child
Legal proof of paternity before he is listed on any documentation
Going through courts or mediation if he wants custody or visitation

Family courts respect the rights of the father, but they also put the child’s best interests first. Because he has lied and left you before, you should talk to a family law attorney right away. Many give free consultations or fees that go up and down (lawhelp.org).

4. Build Your New Village

You might not have the person you were hoping for, but you won’t have to do this by yourself. Now is the time to lean on your chosen family, such as friends, siblings, cousins, teachers, single mom groups, or online parenting communities like Peanut or r/SingleMoms. There is strength in groups, and being a mother was never meant to be done by yourself.

Woman looking distressed after finding out boyfriend’s secret wife just days before giving birth to his child.

Use this time to identify:

A support person for postpartum care
Help with meals, errands, or childcare in the early days
Resources for postpartum mental health and financial aid, if needed

5. Remember: This Is Not Your Shame to Carry

He lied to you. There was nothing wrong with you. The fact that you were ready to get married, start a family, and love him says a lot about who you are. The fact that he was lying, living a double life, and leaving you right before the baby was born? That’s all his fault.

You may feel embarrassed right now, but you shouldn’t be embarrassed. You were the one who was honest. You’re the brave one. The fact that you are about to give birth to a whole life makes you very strong.